Cleaved From One’s Life

2005-12-04

Master Jesus, I want to know You more than anything. I look at myself and have to confess sin. I do not give my heart over to You as I should. I cling to the treasures of the world and seek praise from men. You know all of my sin, but You also know my desire to be used by You. Purify me and prepare me to speak Your word. Show me what to do.

During my last course in Bible college, a friend challenged me. I told him about my ideas of perhaps going into tribal missions and he said he would pray for me. The next day he said to me that he prayed for me, and, while praying, he had the feeling that I would definitely go, but first many things would have to be ‘cleaved from my life.’ So far nothing could be truer, and the road is long. Several years have gone by and many hurdles have passed as I have wrestled with God on many issues. Some issues were relationships with people; other issues included abandoning the prospect of ministry to live a comfortable life. As for the latter, my conscience would not let me do it. I will not be satisfied with anything less than being a mouthpiece for the Gospel, both here and to the ends of the earth. And I cannot rest, we cannot rest, until every last person has heard the Gospel.